Home » Care » It’s Like Taking Candy From a Baby: Part 2

It’s Like Taking Candy From a Baby: Part 2

Just a quick follow up to the previous post about the disappointment I have felt with the care company.

We have spoken to the boss and social services, both of whom have been very helpful and supportive, agreeing that travel time should not be included in the care time we pay for. They are endeavouring to ensure that carers coming to my nans house will stay for the time we pay for. I decided this was probably not the time to question the others who pay for the time but do not get it. But it is still something I feel passionately about, and I will be talking to the social worker in the near future as to what can be done for those without a voice. 

Unfortunately we had more problems with one carer over the weekend, to the point where I have had to tell the company nan and I have agreed we would rather she did not come to the house again. It is not that she is abusive or rude, but she has the wrong attitude for my nan, and does not seem able to grasp the idea of dementia, or how to adapt conversation or requests in a way that a person with dementia can understand. 

Which leads me to the question, am I asking too much from the carers? Are my expectations too high? I seem to get more stress each week from the tiniest issues that arise from carers not doing things the way I expect that I have considered stopping them coming at all. I know in the short term this will ease my stress, but I do not want to completely cut off the option of going out. Even though I refuse to go out at the moment as I am unable to trust the carers enough to have peace of mind leaving nan with them. 

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5 thoughts on “It’s Like Taking Candy From a Baby: Part 2

  1. Hi Kirsty, It is difficult to decent carers, especially those who understand dementia. It amazes me that care givers don’t provide more essential training on this matter.
    Like you, I have also noticed that we are short changed with the time paid for, with carers travelling on to the next appointment within our allocated time.
    We’ve also had dreadful carers who I’ve asked not to come back, brilliant ones who always get moved on unfortunately. Just when it seems a carer learns my mother’s routines, ways and dementia behaviour, they’re moved on! Grrrrr!
    However, don’t give up on them, because you do need to be able to go out to keep sane.
    Arya

    • I know some carers who really are wonderful, but unfortunately seem outnumbered by their under trained counterparts. I fear the carer who my nan gets on with best will be moved on, or that we will lose faith in all!
      You must talk to somebody about the timings as it is unacceptable! And if more people spoke up then maybe less would be ripped off.
      I have recently found myself having full on conversations with my rabbit, I believe sanity may be far behind me!

  2. I too had to ask the agency not to send one certain aide to take care of Mom. She yelled at Mom and called her stupid. And this aide knew Mom had dementia and had taken Alzheimer’s disease training. Everyone has a bad day, aides too. But this was not acceptable.

    • This is terrible to hear! Do know if any disciplinary action was taken against this aide? I accept that they are human too and will have days like us where it is tough, but to take it out on a vulnerable patient is not OK!

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