Been a very strange sort of day today. I hardly slept last night, as some of you be aware I am having a bad reaction to a fair few gnat bites. And the fire coursing through my legs kept me up. Still, I got up this morning regardless, feeling very much in need of a lazy day and not much talking.
So I got the DVD’s out and nan and I watched old home videos of me as a baby. She was laughing all through them, and comparing me as a baby to me now. Apparently there has been no change…not sure if that’s a compliment or not! We then watched Despicable Me. And nan loved it. She kept telling me how clever it was, but other than that I was able to chill. She was laughing along with the jokes and smiled at the happy ending so I think she followed the story quite well. She can’t remember watching a film now though, let alone what the story was.
This evening however nan has seemed very distant and unable to keep up with conversation. She hardly talked through dinner, and during Who Wants To Be A Millionaire we usually like to give the silly answers. But when I answered one of the questions with a silly response she glared at me, then nodded and said “yes. Family Trees trace teachers” as if I was an idiot for doubting it.
It was a bit of a shock. Nan has a great couple of weeks with her memory so I was expecting a drop soon. She seems to be like a rollercoaster, I get used to one lapse and a few weeks/months/days later she drops again, and I have to get used to a whole new nan.
She seems OK now, still not talking much. But I shall just have to keep an eye on her the next few days and monitor what it is that’s making her feel as if she needs to withdraw.
That’s the thing with dementia, you can never get used to it. It is constantly changing and deepening. Adding more and more layers to a more and more confusing illness, and taking away more and more of the person you love.